Photo501.

It has arrived! After weeks of waiting, the Photo501 we ordered from YesAsia has arrived! Woohoo!!

And this week my order for the 1st Story of SS501 DVD will arrive too!

I plan to buy the Super Show DVD but I'm still not sure. I've seen lots of footages in YouTube, and the The-Making DVD has no English subtitles.

Grr. Oh well. Let's see. =)

Happy!

happy Birthday to my dear Tito Pablo!

Horror Movie.

It's 3:52am. Still jobless.

Yesterday marked my mom's 1st death anniversary. A year just flew by -time really does fly. I miss her every day. I miss my dad, too. Not a day passes that I do not think of and miss them. I still choke and get teary-eyed just thinking of my dad. Moreso with my mom. And I can not believe that I do not have them with me as I go through hell.

2009 started out pretty well for me, but the past few months have been difficult. I think my family does not know the extent of my pain and frustration the situation has created for me. I'm still trying to understand things and talking with friends who are going through the same thing greatly helps - but it's not enough. Everyday is just painful. Everyday is torture.

I can truly say that I do not know how things got out of hand. I was just in the middle of the crossfire, minding my own business, and I end up getting shot. Over and over again. And just when the last breath leaves your mouth, your whole life flashes before you.

It's like I'm starring in a horror movie with no end in sight. And I hate horror movies.

Mommy!

Happy Birthday Mommy!

I love you. I miss you.

*Happy Birthday to Kim Hyun Joong, too.

Downpour.

I should've posted this entry a week ago - but I forgot. Hehe.

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It has been raining in Manila for the past 2 or 3 days. The wind was strong, especially last night - our Balete tree fell. Can you imagine a Balete tree falling? Well, it wasn't that big but still. I'm glad the Langka tree is staying strong. Good for her =)

When I was in my grade school days, I'd be real happy when it rains because it means no classes! I wouldn't have to think up of an excuse not to go to school. Hahah! But I also remember my dad saying the rain also brings good luck - whenever we had a birthday in the family it would always rain and that's what he would say to us - swerte.

When I entered college and started to date seriously and have these tragic relationships I'd associate the downpour with the tears I have shed and have yet to shed. Ang cheesy! haha! But it would prompt me to put on sad music and think about my failures. Ka-dramahan talaga.

It's different now. When it rains I feel like grabbing a good book, situate myself on a cozy sofa and read the while away. I'd get a fleece blanket and a squishy pillow so if I fall asleep on the sofa I'd still be comfortable. Sometimes I'd go to my parent's room and look at old photos and reminisce about my childhood. I'd look at pictures and tell myself how lucky I was to have a great family. I'd look at the family trips to the beaches, Baguio, Hong Kong and feel good about myself and how I was brought up.

The downpour does bring memories but let it not bring sad memories.